Sarah went to a seminar at a Melbourne IVF clinic to learn about freezing her eggs, but after talking to a specialist, realised having a child with a donor was going to be the best way for her to achieve her dreams of becoming a mother. After multiple rounds of treatment and 3 donors, she now now lives in Melbourne with her beautiful 15 month old son Noah. In this episode we talk about the mental health journey that goes with conceiving without a partner, the donor selection process and the concept of dating as a solo mum.
TJ had an amazing life, but at 46 had a sudden realisation that she was meant to be a mother. She pursued all avenues, and was eventually successful at 49 with a donor embryo. She and her gorgeous daughter live in NSW. In this episode we discuss the challenges of being an older mum, how your priorities and perspectives change, connecting with donor siblings and how to combat negativity associated with being an older mum. TJ has a YouTube channel sharing her story – MyBabyDream
At 35 Carly realised that her dream of becoming a mother might not eventuate if she didn’t take matters into her own hands and she now lives in Melbourne with her adorable son Lennon. In this episode we discuss her fertility journey, choices she made to set herself up for success and her thought process for factors she needs to consider before possibly going for a sibling.
Try as she might, Billie had no luck finding Prince Charming, so at 36 she took matters into her own hands and made her dreams of becoming a mother a reality. She and her gorgeous 17 month old daughter Luna live in NSW. In this episode we discuss adjusting back to work as a solo mum, making hard decisions to set yourself up for success and how to have fun selecting the donor
What an amazing ride it has been and what a fabulous range of stories and journeys we’ve had over the first 40 episodes. Thank you to all my amazing quests who have shared what they went through to fulfil their dreams of becoming a mother when they took motherhood into their own hands. I thought for the last bonus episode of the year I would ask some of our guests for their reflections and their best advice for anyone on this journey.
I hope you enjoy this episode and thank you for all your support with the podcast so far – don’t forget to reach out if you’d like to share your story xx
Meagan’s mum originally seeded the idea of her becoming a mum using a donor and after trying without luck to find the right partner she decided to go it alone. She now teaches pilates and lives near the beach in Queensland with her gorgeous son Jed. In this episode we talk about what she went through picking her donor, being perceived as an “old” mum and navigating a pretty scary start to Jed’s life with a major surgery to correct craniosynostosis.
Elise decided just before she was 40 that she had to become a mum. She went through a massive 5 year rollercoaster and was eventually successful with known donor eggs and anonymous donor sperm to get her beautiful daughter Eve. In this episode we talk about the importance of family support, surviving baby loss and what she went through to successfully become a mother at 45.
After learning she had fibroids which could impact her fertility, Georgia realised if she wanted kids she might have to take matters into her own hands. It took her a month to make the decision and now Georgia has her gorgeous daughter Violet. In this episode we discuss life with a premature baby, how she’s built an amazing community of other SMBCs and the importance of a specialist you trust during this process.
After focusing on her career and not meeting that special someone, Jac started pursuing foster parenting in order to create her family and help other children. That wasn’t an easy route, so when a friend suggested she have her own child alone, she pivoted and now has her gorgeous son Fletcher. in this episode we discuss foster parenting in Australia, travelling with a young baby and returning to work.
Becoming a solo mum by choice was always in the back of Haylee’s mind and after having a front row seat to her friend going through the journey, she decided to pursue this avenue to motherhood herself. After a pretty dramatic start to mum life, she now lives in Bendigo with her daughter Neve. In this episode we talk about pregnancy after loss, placenta previa and surviving through a premature baby that has to be moved to a hospital outside of your home town.
Sal grew up thinking she never wanted kids, but in reality what she didn’t want was a relationship with a man to get the kids. Once she worked that out she went through an interstate journey to create her gorgeous little family of 3 with her daughter Edie and son Hendrix. In this episode we talk about fertility treatment post with PCOS, navigating pregnancy post an eating disorder, and feeding challenges including using donor milk.
Alycia decided early on she wasn’t going to have children, then a dream just after she turned 35 changed everything. She didn’t have a partner, and didn’t want one, so instead used a spem donor and now has her gorgeous daughter Emmeline. In this episode we talk about egg donation (which Alycia did when she was younger), her thought process choosing her donor and navigating a complicated pregnancy. In a true reflection of solo mum life, little Emmeline joined us for this interview and is at the fun stage of discovering her voice, eg sounding like a velociraptor for a lot of the interview 🙂
Bess spend most of her life looking after other people’s children and really wanted her own, but due to her shyness she didn’t think she’d be able to meet someone to make that dream happen. She now lives in Tasmania with her two gorgeous girls Sadie and Nina. In this episode we talk about the importance of a supportive village, talking about being donor conceived with teachers and meeting donor siblings.
Celeste had travelled, got the prerequisite white fluffy dog, but didn’t have any luck finding a partner to make her family dreams come true. She took matters into her own hands and now lives in Melbourne with her two boys Henry and Charlie. In this episode we talk about adjusting to life as a working Mum, life as a solo mum to two boys and some great advice and questions she wish she’d known when selecting a fertility specialist and OB.
Nikeesha has a debilitating medical condition which meant if she wanted to have children, she didn’t have time to wait for the right partner. After a pretty challenging pregnancy and birth she now has her gorgeous daughter Willa. In this episode we talk about her amazing resilience and attitude throughout many setbacks, the importance of a supportive village, advocating for yourself and some great advice for preparing for life postpartum.
To celebrate 30 episodes this special bonus episode gives us a male perspective and what they go through to be a donor, with some great advice for anyone considering using a known donor to create their family.
I hope you enjoy this episode and thank you for all your support with the podcast so far – don’t forget to reach out if you’d like to share your story xx
Maureen became a solo mum when it was actually illegal to access donor sperm as a single woman in Victoria. Luckily for us a lot has changed since then and Maureen now lives in Melbourne with her two teenagers Lana and Flynn. In this episode we discuss talking about the donor with your kids, meeting your donor, some great lessons from having older kids and the importance of building your village.
Jane initially went down the traditional clinic route to get pregnant on her own without success. She then trusted her intuition and pursued home insemination with a known donor and as a result she now lives in Melbourne with her gorgeous daughter Isabel. In this episode we discuss the importance of the relationship in selecting your experts, what you can do to support home insemination, what you need to do from a legal perspective and having conversations about Isabel’s story from a young age.
Nat decided at a wedding she probably didn’t want to get married, but at that same wedding it became crystal clear she did really want to be a mother. After a pretty long journey including endometriosis and a very stressful second pregnancy, she now lives in Melbourne with her two boys Harry and Hudson. In this episode we talk about managing a pregnancy with a Trisonomy 13 diagnosis, dealing with genetic challenges and she gives some great tips on how she manages her finances, a key concern of many women considering the SMBC avenue to motherhood.
When Sarah returned from the UK she became very aware of her family and friends who had become mothers and the wonderful bond they had. She wanted that life for herself, so she gave herself a time limit, otherwise she was going to have a baby on her own. She didn’t find Prince Charming by that goal, but she now lives in Melbourne with her gorgeous 3 year old Ollie and has recently moved in with a partner. In this episode we talk about dating and finding love as a solo mum, dealing with gender disappointment and Sarah shares some great tips for getting in the right mental headspace for fertility treatment, pregnancy and labour.
I was very honoured to be able to record Karly’s story. She always knew she wanted to become a mum and when the right partner didn’t eventuate she took matters into her own hands and now has her gorgeous daughter Remy Grace. In this episode we talk about the importance of having a fantastic support network, the benefits of getting involved in the local SMBC community and some of the really tough and important life admin things you have to deal with as a solo mum. If you aren’t aware of Karly’s story I strongly recommend you do not listen to this episode on public transport – it’s likely you will need tissues.
For Camilla, 40 was looming and Prince Charming was seriously lost. So she took matters into her own hands and after a dramatic entrance finally became a mum. She lives in Melbourne with her gorgeous 3 year old son Edward. In this episode we talk about navigating the first few months as a mum with challenges, seeking out services in your area for support during these times and her experience making contact with her donor via VARTA.
Hannah was always going to be a mum, so she froze her eggs in her early 30s to give her options, never thinking she’d need them. A few years later and after a lot of research, she went through IVF again, this time with donor sperm. She lives in Queensland with her gorgeous 2 year old daughter Stevie. In this episode we talk about healing after a traumatic birth, a lot of the research she has done into donor conceived children and her experience to date connecting with Stevie’s donor siblings around the world.
Ebony started her journey to become a solo mum while she was living in the UK, and what followed was a long and complex adventure involving multiple countries and donor options. Ebony now lives back in Victoria with her gorgeous 15 month old daughter Lyla. In this episode we talk about the options available for conception, known vs anonymous donors vs coparenting and the mental challenge that can come with this process.
Jen took a long time to make peace with having a baby on her own when meeting the love of her life wasn’t working out as planned. When her mum got sick, she knew it was what she needed to do to make her dreams of being a mother come true. Jen now lives in SA with her gorgeous 4 month old daughter Beatrice. In this episode we talk about the process and grieving you go through when making the decision to let go of the fairytale, coping with the loss of a parent during the journey and advice on getting “advice”.
Danni always wanted to be a Mum, but dating wasn’t leading her to Prince Charming so she decided to do it on her own. Danni now has a successful business in NSW and a gorgeous 2 year old daughter Sophia. In this episode we talk about the importance of research with regards to the clinic you chose, balancing a business and your family, the importance of a good support network and the consideration process she is going through for baby number 2.
For most people Christmas is a time of love, laughter, family, presents and delicious food. This can mean a very expensive time, especially on one income. For this bonus episode I reached out to some of the previous and upcoming podcast guests to get their tips on what they do to make Christmas as magical and stress free as possible.
I hope you enjoy this episode and get some good tips you can put in place to make your Christmas as a Solo Mum that little bit easier xx
Before a friend mentioned pursing having a child alone to Kath, she had never considered it. She was 43 at the time, and decided to just go with it, so when it didn’t work she could put the concept of being a mother behind her. Imagine her surprise when it worked! Kath now lives in Victoria with her gorgeous 3 year old daughter Lily. It hasn’t been an easy journey for Kath and in this episode she talks very openly about her prenatal anxiety and depression, experience with preclampsia resulting in preterm delivery, mental health challenges and navigating motherhood with a premature baby.
For Sam, using a known donor she could have a relationship with and that her children could know as they grew up, was really important to her. As a result of finding the right donor, via a donor website, she now lives in regional NSW with her two gorgeous boys Kai and Eli. In this episode we talk about what she went through to find a known donor, some great advice and red flags she found along the way, navigating a complicated pregnancy in rural Australia and what she went through for baby number 2.
Tash’s Mum knew since she was a toddler that Tash was going be a mum. She loved children so much she ended up becoming a primary school teacher and when the right partner didn’t come along, she decided to have a baby on her own. She lives in Victoria and is now mum to an adorable almost 2 year old daughter Izzy. In this episode we talk about conception after years of disordered eating, the importance of advocating for yourself and what you want along this journey, preparing for birth and how she made the early days a really great time.
In the back of her mind Sasha always had using a donor as an option, as she knew she really wanted to be a Mum. She lives in Queensland and after having her adorable daughter Brooklyn, she started her own business to enable the lifestyle she dreamed of for her family. In this episode we talk about taking the leap to start your own business, considerations for having a second child (including mentally, physically and financially) and how she talks to her daughter about being donor conceived and different family constructs.
After a long road, with many changes in protocol, Amy’s dreams of becoming a mother finally came true in her 40s. She now lives in Melbourne with her 2 gorgeous children Charlie (4) and Molly (4 months). In this episode we talk about pregnancy in your 40s (including being pregnant with number 2 with a toddler), talking to kids about being donor conceived, building an incredible community and even organising holidays with the awesome SMBC village she has built.
In hindsight Rachel wishes she’d decided that she would become a mother without a partner 10 years ago, but not commence treatment until later. Had she done that she wouldn’t have wasted time on relationships that never got her to the goal of having her own child, but could have instead focused on herself and having fun before becoming a mum. Rachel now lives in Adelaide with her gorgeous 18 month old son Arlo. In this episode we talk about different options for conceiving, not to overcomplicate things if you don’t need to, what to ask your clinic, and how to make being a mum alone as easy and enjoyable as possible.
It was a non-negotiable for Jessie that she have children, and after another significant relationship didn’t work out, she decided to take her future into her own hands to ensure her dreams of being a mother would come true. Jessie lives in a New South Wales with her gorgeous 9 month old daughter Joni. In this episode we talk about the what’s important when selecting a clinic, balancing work/life during fertility treatment (and covid restrictions), and options for donor selection.
Carly always knew she would need to use a donor to achieve her dreams of being a mum and decided at a 29 to pursue the solo mum path as she knew she wanted more than one child. Carly lives in NSW with her 3 gorgeous children – Lucy, Theo and Gracie. In this episode we talk about the challenges of juggling 3 kids, difficult pregnancies, not letting anything stand in the way of your dreams and how she makes it all work and look so easy.
Lisa was only 30 when she decided to pursue becoming a mother without a partner. She’s incredibly driven and being a Mum was something she always wanted, so she was no longer willing to wait for a man to make her goals happen. Lisa lives in Western Australia with her gorgeous 3 year old son Teddy. In this episode we talk about the challenges of adapting to being a mum, discovering a new purpose and the significant mental adjustment, as well as the importance of a good support network and the juggle of returning back to full time work.
Lauriane moved to Australia from France with her fiancé and expected to start a family. When the relationship didn’t work out, and knowing she had PCOS, she took matters into her own hands and now lives in Sydney with her gorgeous daughter Chloe. In this episode we talk about the challenges of having a baby alone when your family are in another country, thoughts about siblings and some beautiful new traditions she has started for her pregnant friends.
To celebrate Mother’s Day we catch up with some of our previous guests, and also hear from some upcoming guests, on their reflections on Mother’s Day, and what it’s like to be a SuperMum that takes on the role of 2 parents.
Whether you have a child/children, you have angel babies, furbabies, a baby on the way or just dream of babies, I hope you enjoy the episode and find a way to spoil yourself this Mother’s Day xx
Steph was relatively young when she embarked on the journey to become a solo mum by choice, after already raising foster children. The journey to conceive wasn’t as straight forward as you would think at that age, but she currently lives in Queensland with her 2 beautiful boys Madden and Scout. In this episode we talk about her journey to conceive, how she makes it all work and plans for siblings. Make sure you listen until the end for a little surprise….
Leah hadn’t considered becoming a mother without a partner until a comment from a co-worker made her reconsider her path to the white picket fence. What followed that comment was a rollercoaster of unexpected medical diagnosis, multiple rounds of IVF, travel for treatment and even a relationship. Leah lives in Tasmania with her gorgeous 10 month old son Jack. In this episode we talk about the importance of finding medical professionals you trust, perseverance and determination when things aren’t going as planned, and the challenges of dating whilst trying to become an SMBC.
Sarah’s road to becoming a mum wasn’t a smooth one, but with the help of an amazing fertility specialist/Obstetrician she overcame fertility challenges, a very stressful pregnancy, an incompetent cervix and her son being born at only 34 weeks. Sarah lives in Melbourne with her gorgeous son Hartley, who was only 12 weeks old when we recorded this interview. In this episode we talk about the importance of medical professionals working for you, birth plans vs reality as a solo mum with a premature baby, and the challenges of being a plus sized Mum.
Carla knew without a doubt she was meant to be a mum so started the process to become a solo mum by choice after plan A didn’t work out as expected. Carla lives in a small town in Queensland with her gorgeous son James. In this episode we talk about the lack of fertility education, how important a support network is and balancing motherhood, work and your own business.
Kaylee always dreamed of being a Mum, but not having any luck finding the right person to start a family with she decided to pursue having a child on her own. With the help of her fabulous specialist she overcame an unexpected endometriosis diagnosis, had a relatively easy conception and after a challenging introduction to pregnancy she went on to have a beautiful birth. Kaylee lives in the Gold Coast with her gorgeous daughter Ottilie. In this episode we talk about her amazing mindset, how she overcame some hurdles along the way, what was important to her in selecting a donor and adjusting to life as a working solo mum.
The app Kaylee mentions that was useful for her natural IUI is called “Period Diary”.
Sally decided to pursue becoming a solo mum by choice in order to give her son Riley from a previous relationship a sibling. She is one of the youngest SMBC’s I have interviewed, and is seriously impressive conceiving whilst being a full time mum, working and studying! Whilst Sally was “young” in terms of fertility, the journey to conceive Angus wasn’t as quick or easy as one would hope. In this episode we talk about her amazing resilience and determination plus the lifestyle changes she made to make her village and family dream a reality.
Once Lisa made the decision to have a baby on her own, she threw herself into the journey, putting complete trust in the experts around her with fabulous results. She lives in Melbourne with her adorable 3 year old Luca. In this episode we discuss Lisa’s journey including the importance of having a good support network, especially in the early days and some great advice on what she’d do differently if she was to do this all again.
Getting closer to 40 and after trying everything to find that special someone, Christina took matters into her own hands. She lives in Sydney with her gorgeous 7 month old daughter Eliza. Hopefully Prince Charming will turn up in future, when/if Christina has time or space in their lives for him. In this episode we discuss Christinas’s journey including dating disasters and the importance of building a supportive village when you go it alone.
Feona and Siena live in Melbourne, and love being a SMC family. Feona is very open and honest about deciding to go overseas and use two anonymous donors to conceive her gorgeous 4 1/2 year old Siena. Recently Feona and Siena have started connecting with Siena’s (half) siblings and love getting to know these new member’s of their family. In this episode we discuss Feona’s journey including what it was like organising treatment in another country and what she has been through to connect to Siena’s siblings (or diblings).
Alisha has a gorgeous almost 2 year old who was conceived using donor sperm in Victoria. It was a long 10 year journey to finally become a Mum, and while this wasn’t plan A, it was definitely the best decision she ever made. Hear her story of loss, conception, donor selection, having a baby alone in a pandemic and the first couple of years as a Solo Mum by Choice.